October 21, 1970 I found some old papers. (Satprem reads) "I am told that you intend to distribute a reproduction of the portrait you did of me. It would be better not to introduce in this gathering anything personal that might suggest the atmosphere of a nascent religion." It was for Auroville and it was a portrait by Y, did you see it? You saw that portrait?! (Mother laughs) It was a polite way of telling her. Only, she didn't listen to me, she distributed it. *** (Then Mother listens to the English translation of an extract from the "infernal Agenda" of September 9, which Satprem intended to publish in the forthcoming "Notes on the Way." Nolini

March 28, 1970 (Mother holds a note out to Satprem) This is what I sent for the conferences of the New Age Association. [[An association of students from the Ashram. ]] They asked, "Is the aim of life to be happy?..." So I replied: "That is just putting things topsy-turvy."The aim of human life is to discover the Divine and to manifest it. Naturally, this discovery leads to happiness, but this happiness is a consequence, not an aim in itself. And it is this mistake of taking a mere consequence for the aim of life that has been the cause of most of the miseries afflicting humanity." What do they mean by "happiness"! Yes! Everyone thinks it's his o

November 14, 1970 So then, what's new? I have finished my book. Oh!... Good, that's good. How many chapters still to be read? We've readied half, I'm reading you the eighth. There are sixteen. It'll go on till January. Do you want to hear all of it? Yes, of course! (Mother laughs) (Satprem starts reading the end of the eighth chapter: "The Change of Vision." Afterwards, Mother remains long absorbed, as if deep in meditation.) I always go off - it's strange - into a ... like a new country. It happens to me every time. (silence) Do you think people will be able to translate this? (silence) It's calm (vast gesture), luminous - it's magnifice

September 9, 1970 The Hell (Mother seems very slightly better, though still quite exhausted.) I had something to tell you, but I don't remember at all.... Maybe it'll come back. (very long silence, then Mother gestures that she remembers and plunges in again) It's coming, but not yet precise enough. Do YOU have anything to ask? Was it related to "that night," when you were as if in hell? Yes, it was related to that. It was ... I'll try to explain. You know that OM is said to be the sound of the whole universe turned towards the Supreme, imploring the Supreme - and the result is OM. I had the impression that I was all the pain of the world - all the pain of

September 2, 1970 (Mother's first words for almost a month. Her left eye is very swollen, her voice husky. It is not over yet.) Forbidden to speak: it makes me cough terribly. (long meditation) Do you know a man with slightly red hair, or dark blond, and a beard? ??? No?... He was here (gesture next to Satprem). You don't know who it is?... He was sitting like that, on the ground. (Mother looks again) You have many disciples now, don't you? Who? [[Satprem heard "he has many disciples" and thought Mother was referring to this red-haired man. It never occurred to him he could have disciples! ]] (silence) Who? (silence) Not me?! (Mothe

October 7, 1970 I have received quotations from Sri Aurobindo. Read this. "To persevere in turning towards the Light is whatis most demanded. The Light is nearer to us than we think ... This is interesting! "... and at any time its hour may come." On Himself, 26.216 Page 338 It's from 1943. What he called "the Light" is the Consciousness that came in ... (Mother tries to remember), it came in 1969. Oh, the New Consciousness. And the other one? The other quotation is a mantra. OM Sri Aurobindo Mira Open my mind, my heart, my life to your Light, your Love, your Power. In all things may I see the Divine. 16 July 1938

October 31, 1970 (Mother tries to read with difficulty a few lines from Savitri specially written for her in large characters.) It's a curious phenomenon: it's F. who writes this, and she doesn't understand well: for her it's just words - and I can't read! Yes, I understand. It's the consciousness she put into it. *** (Then Mother listens to a few letters of Sri Aurobindo.) (Question:) X asked me if in the course of rebirths a womancan become a man, and a man a woman. He thought of certain feminine traits in him that could be explained thus. I would also like to know if there is in the psychic being itself something like sex? Page 360 (Answe

June 20, 1970 I'd like to tell you that for some time I've had troubles with my body.... Oh? A bit disorganized. What happened to it? I don't know. ... I feel something threatening me. Since when? About a month. But where does it hurt? A functioning is disorganized. I feel there's an obstruction or something, or ... well, I don't know what's wrong. (after a silence) Page 237 You see, the Force of transformation is working very, very strongly, and many people are like that: the functions are no longer "normal," as they are called, that is to say, the functionings are changing, and so the first impression is always that of a diso

May 27, 1970 I think it's the pressure of this Consciousness, but lots of people are quarreling in the Services, and particularly at the Press. So I wrote something: (Mother holds out a note) "You seem to forget that, by the very fact that youlive in the Ashram, you work neither for your selves nor for an employer, but for the Divine. Your life must be a consecration to the divine Work and cannot be governed by petty human considerations." Would you like to publish it, or have it posted up? Maybe it's a bit too public.... What we could do ... It's especially at the Press that things are like that, so it would be amusing to give it to them (laughing) and tell

October 14, 1970 While sorting papers, I found this. I don't know what it is. (Satprem reads) Page 345 "My hair is not dyed. It is its natural color, except for a slight reddish hue that comes from the soapbark lotion I use to wash my head. "When I used to go out, I had to put rose juice on my lips so they would not chap, and sumo (powder of burned pearl) on my eyelids to prevent irritation by sunlight and dust. "To take care of one's skin and hair is no more artificial than to take care of one's teeth. "If a sadhika [a female disciple] has spare time and the inclination to make up, I see no harm in that, provided she does not do it out of vanity or aff