October 7, 1956 I cried towards the Light and Thou gayest me knowledge. Z asked me, 'Why didn't you stop it?" I replied, 'Probably because I am not omnipotent!' Then he insisted: 'No, that's not it. I make no distinction between your will and the divine will ... and I know that you don't either. So why didn't you stop it?' And suddenly, I understood. It was because I hadn't thought of it. It hadn't even grazed my consciousness. The divine will is not at all like that, it is not a will: it is a VISION, a global vision, that sees and ... No, it does not guide (to guide suggests something outside, but nothing is outside), a creative vision, as it were; yet even then, the word

March 19, 1956 AGENDA OF THE SUPRAMENTAL ACTION ON EARTH On March 19 during the translation class the inner voice said: 'Hold yourself straight' and the body sat up and held itself absolutely straight during the entire class. 1. The following text was given by Mother in both French and English. 2. Later added by Mother 3. Note written by Mother in French At this period, Mother's back was already bent. This straightening of her back seems to be the first physiological effect of the 'Supramental Manifestation' of February 29, which is perhaps the reason why Mother noted down the experience under the name 'Agenda of the Supramental Action on Earth.' It was

Undated 1956 (e) (Letter to Mother from Satprem) Pondicherry Sweet Mother, I feel intensely, almost painfully, how much all my relationships with the outer world are FALSE, obscure, ignorant. As soon as I am away from the heart of my being, all my actions are approximations, all my contacts with other beings are turbid, my work itself becomes tainted with a thousand doubtful little motives. Mother, I know with a blinding certitude - even if this certitude is only mental - that the only solution is to come into contact with my true being. I know that by finding my true being I shall find the right action, the right relationships with the outside, and truth, knowledge, joy. I kno

July 12, 1960 Last night something happened to me that I found quite amusing. I was awakened by a Voice, or rather it roused me from one trance to put me into another. It happened at about 11 o'clock. Not a human Voice. I don't exactly recall its words any longer, but it had to do with the Ashram - its protection, its success, its power. And what was interesting was that when I woke up, I was in a state in which this formation that is the Ashram and the Force that is condensed here to realize what this Voice wanted, seemed a very tiny, tiny part of myself. I heard the Voice and awoke with the feeling of this Power, this Light, this Force of realization concentrated here which sets eve

March 14, 1961 I haven't done anything, haven't worked, answered questions or prepared anything for the Bulletin - nothing at all. You saw the people waiting in the corridor; when I left the other day they kept me there three-quarters of an hour and when I finally went upstairs I was ill. Not really ill but not well. So once again it's all called into question. (Mother goes on to the work and listens to the reading of an old Talk of September 26, 1956, to be used in the Bulletin. In it she speaks of moments of opening in the yoga: 'Then there are days when you are in contact with the divine Consciousness, with the Grace, and all is tinged, colored by this Presence, and things whi

December 18, 1961 (Letter to Mother from Satprem) Sweet Mother, A long letter from the publisher. He has understood NOTHING, felt nothing in this book, finding it 'too abstract.' In a word, they won't accept it without extensive modifications and 'explanations.' May your will be done, With love, Signed: Satprem (Mother's reply affixed to Satprem's letter.) This was to be expected. But don't go and spoil your book just to make it digestible for them. We shall publish it here, taking out the unnecessary pictures - having only a few will make the book more interesting. I suppose you can return their money and cancel the contract - but reserve the right to

March March 4, 1961 (Mother gives Satprem a ruffled mauve petunia.) Look, it's Enthusiasm, see how beautiful it is! It must be put in water right away, otherwise.... It needs vital force and water is vital force. It's lovely! What fantasy! And this one is the Consciousness one with the Divine Consciousness, [[Hibiscus, double flower, light pink. ]] but supramentalized - beginning to be supramentalized. And here is a very pretty Promise of Realization [[Nasturtium. ]] , and here's Balance [[Begonia. ]] and ... the Peace of Faithfulness. [[Portlandia grandiflora. ]] There you are, mon petit. Now then, anything to ask? (silence) Oh, it's dreadful, each one ... (Mother is

June 6, 1961 (Mother arrives looking weary. Satprem asks if she is tired.) No.... I had finished reading the Veda and wanted to take up The Life Divine, but as I had never read On Himself, [[Sri Aurobindo's letters on his life, his experience and his yoga. ]] I chose it instead. I read the first chapter dealing with his life in England and to me it all seemed.... Oh, why speak of all these things in connection with Sri Aurobindo? Why? I know quite well that he himself has replied - or rather rectified inexact things people had said about him - but it made such a painful impression on me! Such a painful impression. Something must definitely be done which is free of that whole useless

December 16, 1961 (Mother comes in with a rolled-up paper.) Here's my original manuscript - although it's not very 'original.' It's a message for the first of January. One day ... (I'm translating the last section of The Synthesis of Yoga, 'The Yoga of Self-Perfection' - it plunges you into bottomless gulfs ... ) and one day (I think I've told you this), I had a vision of the gap between ... not even what ought to be, because we probably haven't the slightest idea of that, but between our concept of what we would like to be and what is. And it was so dreadful that the body was thrown into, oh ... an anguish, a horror; and along with it an intensity of aspiration, a prayer. The g

July 18, 1961 66 - Sin is that which was once in its place, persisting now it is out of place; there is no other sinfulness. I don't feel any inspiration. Do you have a question? Sin is said to be something no longer in its place. But has something like cruelty, for example, ever had a 'place'? Exactly what came to me - I receive all the questions people ask. The question arises immediately: if one kills out of cruelty, for instance, or inflicts pain out of cruelty, did that ever have a place? ... For even though deformed in appearance, it is nevertheless (we always come back to the same thing) an expression of the Divine. What lies behind, tell me? Sri Aurobind