August 7, 1963 You look tired.... The difficulties are continuing. There's a keen struggle against the constant Negation of all inner life - higher life, rather. That is to say, the general Disbelief [in the body]. It's giving me the same kind of nights again. But it's odd, I don't know what it means, last night there were buildings made of a kind of red granite, and many Japanese. Japanese women sewing and making ladies' dresses and fabrics; Japanese youths climbing up and down the buildings with great agility; and everybody was very nice. But it was always the same thing (gesture of a collapse or a fall into a hole): you know, a path opens up, you walk on it, and after a whil

November November 4, 1963 (Mother looks tired) Yesterday, I had resolved to see Sujata, and they kept me standing there arranging objects, perfectly unnecessarily, under the pretext that there are showcases, that visitors are expected and that the objects should be arranged in the showcases.... After spending more than an hour on that work, I told them, "Go away, I've had enough! And - do whatever you like." I was exasperated. An avalanche of people, of letters, of things, of complications.... But at the same time, there's an avalanche of ... (how can I put it?) - everything, everything is becoming so new. Everything. Everything. An example: yesterday, for at least a quarte

September 25, 1963 (Mother first reads her notation of a recent experience) It came in English. (I want to put it in the Bulletin to fill a gap!) We should put it in French, too. Love is ... (no need to say that it's the condensation of an experience - an experience I leave unsaid). Love is not sexual intercourse. Love is not vital attraction and interchange. Love is not the heart's hunger for affection. Love is a mighty vibration coming straight from the One. And only the very pure and very strong are capable of receiving and manifesting it. Then an explanation on what I mean by "pure," the very pure and very strong: To be pure is to be open only to the Supreme's infl

December December 3, 1963 (Regarding the difficulties of certain disciples) ... But anyway, it's settling down - we are in the years of settling down. Everyone is caught by his own illusion - it's always the mirage of an illusion. She [Y.] is convinced, it is her very deep belief, that she is causing the Supermind to descend upon earth. And many, many people among those I know are caught by that illusion; so they go off at a tangent far away from the Truth, towards a "fabulous" realization. Pride, vanity - that's the worst trap. And when they feel that sort of vital force in them [as Y. does], they believe all at once that they have caught the Thing.... The farther I go, th

February 21, 1963 (Message given by Mother for February 21:) The boon that we have asked from the Supreme is the greatest that the Earth can ask from the Highest, the change that is most difficult to realise, the most exacting in its conditions. It is nothing less than the descent of the supreme Truth and Power into Matter, the supramental established in the material plane and consciousness and the material world and an integral transformation down to the very principle of Matter. Only a supreme Grace can effect this miracle. The supreme Power has descended into the most material consciousness but it has stood there behind the density of the physical veil, demanding before manif

May 22, 1963 (This conversation took place a few days after Satprem had a violent attack of an infectious "illness.") The other evening, around 6:30, I was in a lot of pain; my head seemed about to burst, I really suffered: a racking pain. Then I lay down, and suddenly I felt a sort of relaxation - a sudden reversal followed by an easing. And, the next day, I came to know that it happened at the precise time when V. told you I was ill. Not only that, but there was a rather peculiar experience: a Will came into me.... I don't know, a Will: "Decide." Something that wanted me to decide: "It's for you to decide." So I immediately cast that Power on you, saying, "He must be cured." It's a

January 30, 1963 What are you going to read to me today? Nothing? Nothing at all? Well, I have something, then. I have finished my translation [of the Synthesis]. When you have finished your book and we have prepared the next Bulletin and we have a nice quiet moment, we'll go over it again. And then I've begun Savitri - ah! ... As you know, I prepare some illustrations with H., and for her illustrations she has chosen some passages from Savitri (the choice isn't hers, it's A.'s and P.'s and made intelligently), so she gives me these passages one by one, neatly typed (which is easier for my eyes). It's from the Book I, Canto IV. Page 37 And then, as I expected, the experien

July 13, 1963 I receive letters from everywhere, from Argentina, Canada and so on, from people I don't know but who are really sweet. Listen to this one (Mother takes a letter from beside her), it's from the mother of Z, who is here: If I were within walking distance of you, I would pick a rose, not yet full bloomed, laden and fragrant, to lay at your feet. This sounds like a love letter - well, it is! My son has been trying to teach me through you that all letters should be love letters.... It's lovely. So I replied like this: Indeed, all life is love if we know how to live it. And then Nolini told me ... (Mother relates some Ashram affairs) ... The Force seems to act more stron

August 21, 1963 (Regarding an old "Playground Talk," of January 4, 1951, in which Mother said that one of the essential conditions for transformation is an awareness of the inner dimensions: "It's a total reversal of consciousness, which can be compared to what happens to light when it goes through a prism. Or else it's as if you turned a ball inside out, which can be done only in the fourth dimension. You emerge from the ordinary consciousness of the third dimension to enter the higher consciousness of the fourth dimension, and then an infinite number of dimensions. This is the indispensable starting point.") That's what I had told you already: the whole basis of the yogic effort is

December 21, 1963 (Regarding the "joys" of Tantric discipline, when Satprem was still at his seven thousandth, or was it seven hundred thousandth, Tantric yantram. Satprem unfortunately did not keep the beginning of this conversation.) ... It's true, in fact, off and on I have fits of revolt, but more and more I'm settling into a kind of nothingness - not many things have meaning. I was very attached to life, I loved life, I found it beautiful - that's gone. Oh, yes, I can understand that! But still, there was something good in that love of life, wasn't there? Yes ... for later on, when life is different from what it is. Now that's gone, if I were told, "You will die to