November 26, 1969 (The whole time is spent in meditation.) Nothing to say ... Every time I try to look at something, it goes away like this (gesture into the infinite). (Mother goes off into meditation again) Did you feel anything particular yesterday [at the darshan]? I felt it wasn't quite as usual, but I don't know what. In the morning, I had the experience of an awesome Force which came, weighing on all things. That's also what others felt the whole day long. A force ... most people told me, "A joyous force." But as Page 451 for me, when I went there [to the balcony], the difference was that the body was more conscious of ... its state of tran

April 9, 1969 How are you? Ah, it's better. Yes, since last time, I've felt an improvement. Oh, good. I think that's what was affecting me for the past year [i.e., those occult schemings]. Because it was always at night that those headaches and eyeaches used to come-always. At night ... it's disgusting! I think I could resume my work, couldn't I? No hurry. Do you have some news? There's a question Id like to tell you about. It's about the publication of Sri Aurobindo's books in France. You know that we sent The Synthesis of Yoga and The Human Cycle. [[Sent to Fayard publishers. ]] The woman who looks after those publications hasn't reacted very

February 15, 1969 Just one thing, this atmosphere, this [superman] Consciousness is very active, and active like a mentor, as I already told you. And it's going on. One of these last few mornings, for a few hours early in the morning, it was ... Never, never had the body been so happy! It was the complete Presence, absolute freedom, and a certitude: these cells, other cells (gesture here and there showing other bodies), it didn't matter, it was life everywhere, consciousness everywhere. Absolutely wonderful. It came effortlessly, and it left simply because ... I was too busy. It doesn't come at will - what comes at will is what we might call a "copy": it looks like it, but it's

July 26, 1969 (Mother wants to revise with Satprem a few passages of her translation of 'Savitri.') But now I've come to notice that they cut these quotations, they leave out two lines in the middle - suddenly I'll say to myself, "But it doesn't hang together!" I'll ask, and F. tells me, "Yes, they left out one line, two lines ...." So what's to be done? It's absurd. Here, all this is ready. I don't need to see it again: it's for you to see it. It's my translation. What should I do? (Laughing) See if my translation is good! But Mother, listen ... why? No, because some things might be put in a better way. Yes, but I'm wary. You know, I have

June 25, 1969 (For some time Mother's health has been very upset. Most ofher recent meetings with Satprem were spent in silent contemplation.) ... Then there is little S.U. (do you know S.U.?), who isn't too happy with her work and asked me if I couldn't help her make some progress. So I told her, "Read Satprem's book ...." She started reading Satprem's book. She told me "If I don't understand something, what do I do?" I said, "If you can't understand, ask me." So yesterday, she quoted a bit of a sentence to me (you know how they do: they take a bit of a sentence and ask you, "Whatever does this mean?!"). I answered. It was a sentence in which it was said that there were two "p

December 10, 1969 (Mother first writes at one go a message for the start of the new school year.) One must have lived what one wants to teach. To speak of the new consciousness, let it penetrate you and reveal Page 465 its secrets to you. For only then will you be able to speak of it with competence. * To leap into the new consciousness, the first condition is a mental modesty sufficient to be convinced that all one thinks one knows is nothing in comparison with what remains to be learned. All that one has learned externally must be only a foothold enabling one to rise towards higher knowledge. ***

August 20, 1969 (The Vatican disciple has arrived in Pondicherry) I saw PL.... There are two things, first a personal one, then a moregeneral one. He said the last time he saw you, after leaving you he went to the Samadhi, and there he suddenly had an extremely sharp pain in the lower abdomen. But he said it was very strange because it didn't feel like an ordinary pain: it didn't stop him from walk ing about, but it remained centered there - a sharp pain. Page 295 As for me, I am afraid those people there may have cast a spell on him. You think it's that? ... I don't know; when he said that, I felt itwas one of the lower "centers" that was tou

December 27, 1969 Do you have anything to say? ... I am so immersed in so many practical or material things .... (Mother laughs) One feels a bit swallowed up in Matter ... no? These last few days, I've rather had the impression of being surrounded by a TOTAL incomprehension - but I'm used to that! But it had become so acute; I've received questions, reproaches, anyway, all kinds of things .... It was like a spirit of incomprehension rising up everywhere, and I felt it was rising deliberately because the time had come to do something .... "Why is this done? Why is that done? Why are things like this? ..." And most of the time, based on tendentious information or incorr

January 15, 1969 (After the visit of an "Acharya," or Jain master, who came surrounded with his disciples.) He tried every way to make me talk! I refused. I had never seen them, with their mouths covered [[Jain sadhus or monks cover their mouths with a patch of cloth so as not to swallow microbes. ]] - it doesn't stop them from talking! It seems he said yesterday (he came yesterday) that he hadn't yet begun his sadhana, that he was going round India and would begin his sadhana afterwards .... He asked me for a message; I didn't tell him anything, but inwardly I said to him, "Be sincere, be sincere ...." But I didn't speak. He even tried flattery, but it didn't w

December 3, 1969 Every day there are two girls (almost every day) who ask me questions, and I answer them. Some answers would be really interesting to have .... I don't know what I should do to get them. Naturally, they're personal questions, but I answer in a general way. It's beginning to rise. The effect of this new Consciousness (it's taken a year) is that things are beginning to rise. *** (Then, regarding the forthcoming "Notes on the Way" in whichMother speaks of her experience of the supramental Consciousness-the conversation of November 19.) What I said about the supramental consciousness, is it clear? I think it's very clear! Because whe